I feel scared of tonight and of this afternoon. I could not sleep and Ben is going out tonight. I feel afraid of self-pity, "what the hell", etc. I want to eat well today, not be depressed, and not be afraid.
I have started a personal challenge of 21 days of no refined sugar and no "protein bars". They are not helpful! We'll see I guess.
I feel sad and lonely today. I want to go out and do something, but what?
I keep feeling guilty about not going back to OA. I feel as though I am a sinner running from redemption. Yet I have read about many people losing weight without OA. Am I powerless over food? Is it possible for me to stop binging without the 12 steps?
I just want to eat healthily, not binge, and workout.
I can do it!
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